So here I sit again in front of my computer. It seems like I only ever write when something is going well or when something isnt. Im honestly not sure which one it is this time. Stacey is one of the coolest girls Ive had the privilege to know over the past plethora of years that Ive existed. Its just hard right now to see where things are going. The more I look at myself the more I see me falling into old patterns that I thought I had broken. Only thinking of things I want to do with/for her but then not doing them. Unlike the previous times she totally deserves everything that has crossed my mind, but still for some reason I restrain myself from some things. Now it isnt many things, and Im actually pretty pleased with how things have gone so far. Its just a few things that I wish I would stop putting off, things that I know she deserves. Its to the point where Im starting to think that if I cant do them for her that she would deserves someone who would. Because I forgot one of my favorite quotes as of recently and was reminded of it tonight.
“…in a complete lifetime. One swallow does not make a summer; neither does on day. Similarly neither can one day, or a brief space of time, make a man blessed and happy” Aristotle in Ethics
I need to stop waiting for one moment to show her how I feel and let her know how I feel and let every moment be a testament to that. I really am not sure why Im going to post this, its mostly just me thinking through things in my mind but writing them out as I go. Maybe its so I can hold myself accountable for these thoughts Im having tonight. Whatever it is I am going to really try to make those few things Ive thought of happen. If I dont then I may never get the chance.
Take Care and God Bless,
~paul prins